Marc and Megan Logo

family photo family photo family photo family photo family photo family photo

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Not on my own

1 Corinthians 10:13 - God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted (tested or proven) above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

I've always taken great comfort in the promise in the scriptures that we won't be tested or tried above what we can handle. Except there are times (like now) when I've doubted that promise, questioning if God really knows me well enough to know what I can and can't handle. I find it interesting that every hard experience we've been through has been preceded by the thought, "that won't ever happen to us, because I just couldn't handle something like that." (I've since stopped thinking such thoughts... why tempt God to prove me wrong?)  

I've come to the conclusion that I really can't handle this experience. I've tried, believe me. Fortunately there is another part of the equation - the Lord. I really can't get through this, if I don't have the Lord's help. If I leave off that last part, then I am 100% right that I won't make it through this or any other really hard thing that comes in life. But, with God, I can do all things. 

Standing on the outside of the refiner's fire, looking in, it's impossible to know the comfort and peace that will come while being in its midst. As we've entered this particular refiner's fire, and felt the extreme heat and pressure, we've actually experienced some of the most powerful moments, as they have provided us with experiences to feel a greater measure of the Lord's awareness of and love for us.  

I know I can't pray for my daughters to come back to life... this burden is with me to stay. But, I can pray for a stronger back to carry the burden. And, while my weak muscles are going through growing pains, I know the Lord is doing His fair share of shouldering my burden, because He loves me. 

Lately the burden has been heavy, the pain acute... and, I know the fastest way to find relief from that most intense pain is on my knees.

Without fail, He is always there.

The promise isn't that we will be able to handle life's greatest tests on our own... the promise is that with the Lord we will get through these paths that we do not know. It is only through our reliance on and acceptance of the Savior's help, that He will get us through life's hardest moments. Whatever the challenge, whatever the heartache, when we call out for help to make it through, we will find strength beyond our own to overcome.

I have found the Lord has lifted me, He has made up for the strength that I lack. He has soothed my heartache in such dark moments that I know the relief could only come from Him.

Alma 13: 28-29 - But that ye would humble yourselves before the Lord, and call on his holy name, and watch and pray continually, that ye may not be tempted (tested or proven) above that which ye can bear, and thus be led by the Holy Spirit, becoming humble, meek, submissive, patient, full of love and all long-suffering;  Having faith on the Lord; having a hope that ye shall receive eternal life; having the love of God always in your hearts, that ye may be lifted up at the last day and enter into his rest.


Kim said...

These same words and thoughts have spoken volumes to me over the last little while. I needed to come here tonight to read these words, I am always feeling alone...and that I can't do this or I can't do that...but I forget it is at these times he is carrying me, just as he is carrying you. We love you...a thousand miles away...and we love you.

Head Nurse/Patient- you be the judge said...

Time- although the great "healer" doesn't erase- nor would you want it to. My dear little nephew was born at 21 weeks and lived just one day- but we all think of him, keep track of where he "is" he would have been 8 last April. He is a part of our family and our lives and we visit his grave frequently. Prayer in my heart for you both.

Amy said...

This was a great post. In some ways it seems like it's really not our role to try to consciously apply Gospel principles to our situations--it's our job to come before the Lord with a totally broken heart and ask for help and healing. Just be vulnerable I guess.
I have no idea if that made any sense.
But you're not supposed to be able to do it on your own....I know that made sense at least!

The De Vries Family said...

I hope you don't mind that I post a comment on your blog, even though we've never met. I found your blog through my good friend, Amy, and I really feel inspired to leave a comment. Have you ever heard the song "In My Arms" by Plumb? Well, I just heard it the other day and was knocked over by the words. To anyone listening, the song might simply be talking about the relationship between a parent and a child, but for me, I saw it as the relationship between me and Heavenly Father. Here is the main chorus, "When the clouds will rage and storms will race in, but you will be safe in my arms. Rains will pour down, waves will crash all around, but you will be safe in my arms."

mindyluwho said...

Your post made me think about an experience I had a couple of years ago that taught me a great principle about the atonement. I wrote a post on my blog about it, but I'd like to share a little exerpt here.

"Yesterday I felt peace in my heart. My house was a mess, I wasn't accomplishing all the things I needed to, but I felt peace. As I was driving down the road contemplating it I suddenly realized what I was experiencing was the atonement working in my life. I understood what it meant when different groups of people in the scriptures said that their burdens were made light. I could never comprehend that before, but what I came to understand is the way it happens is different for everyone. For me, to make my burdens light means to take the tightness out of my chest. To make it so that when I see my messy house, or when I think of all the things I should be teaching my children, or when I think of all the roles I have to fill, that I don't get that panicky feeling and want to give up."

What this experience taught me was that the Lord knows me personally and his atonement works for me in the way that I need it and I am ever grateful for that.

As always, thank you for sharing this heartache and growth experience with us. You are an inspiration.