Together Forever

* Sealing Day - Sept. 4, 2010 (both boys were so tired!)

Walking into that room, full of light and so much love, I was struck with how hard it was to keep the tears from coming. We were surrounded by both of our families and the dearest of friends, many who had traveled long distances to be with us. It was a big day for our little family. And it meant so much to share it with those who were able to be there.

Marc and I sat next to each other, much like we did the day we were married eight years ago, listening to words of wisdom from an inspired man - President Hunter. (As in, the son of the late prophet. I had the privilege of getting to know him and his wife during the 18 months I worked in the temple.) While I was pleased to hear him speak to us, I have to admit that my mind was racing with thoughts about Ben and Hugh and I felt anxious for them to join us in that room of light and love. It felt wonderful, and yet not nearly complete without them.

Then from the open door and down the hall I heard the unmistakable sounds of my babies. I always wondered how mothers could tell their baby's cry from other babies... and I still don't have the answer, just the confirmation that you just do.

Ben and Hugh entered the room and, clearly, this was heaven. There in that little room my family was together. I feel certain that the spirits of those who have passed on are privy to special occasions like this one and by the overwhelming feeling alone, I was sure of it. While I don't talk much about Elliana and Emmaline these days, in public or in private, the reality of who they are and the place they have in my life and in our family comes at times with such great force. I feel at peace with where they are and I feel so grateful for the connection I still am able to feel with them.

Ben was dressed handsomely, all in white. His blue eyes were extra bright. While he was a bit more squirmy than usual, I loved that it was all because of the gorgeous chandelier hanging above our heads that captured his attention and demanded to be examined. It was just like him - our little observer. Plus, he loves light. I hope his literal love for light is just as strong figuratively. And, I hope one day he'll know how much he, himself, has been a light in our lives. 

The official part was over before we knew it. We were told 10 days prior by a judge that he was legally ours. On this special day we were told by a man with special authority from God Himself that Benjamin was ours eternally. The words that were expressed are too sacred to repeat, but the feelings and the mental images are seared in my mind and heart forever.

While Ben and Hugh are much too young to probably remember this day as they grow older, I look forward to sharing the details with them and telling them their story of how they came to be a part of our family. I've long gotten the feeling that they didn't come to us in their pair because of how great Marc and I are (because, if anything, we're below average on any measurable scale), but because of the bond these two boys share and the bond I'm guessing they shared before they were born. Even now, at their young ages, we're already getting glimpses of that bond and it is the most beautiful thing to witness.

The day Ben became ours forever is a day that might not ever be beat. It stands alone with the day we were married. I am grateful that the brief moments in that room of light and love were peaceful and calm. Especially since the days leading up to it and the days following were a bit on the crazy side, to say the least. 

But, that day... the day my little family was together... gave me a tiny glimpse into what awaits us eternally.

To say "I can't wait" is the understatement of the century.